Sneezing with a mouth full of yoghurt is an interesting time

Makes me laugh when women are bashful about saying they’re on their second or third husband, like that’s a bad thing. Bitch I can’t even get one husband let alone two or three so shut the hell up.

Idris comes back to work today after a weekend DJ’ing at Coachella….

I asked him what his DJ name was and he said “Idris Elba” to which I said “that is unbelievably boring”

So he said “Ok, I’ll change it to Katie Jones”.

This is my life now, I am a superstar DJ.

Goodbye peasants

Xx